I’m wondering if this could be of interest to you?
Research proves: The fastest and surest way to increase self-esteem is to commit estimable acts. Every day. For others and then for yourself. These acts can be as small as talking the time to speak to an elder in a grocery line, complimenting a child, holding a door or much bigger acts with higher rewards. Whenever you commit an estimable act oxytocin is immediately released and you feel good. This encourages you to do it more often, which causes you to feel better more often. I cannot repeat this enough. The people I treat who are the most unhappy and the most anxious are those that are doing the least for others (and I’m not talking about their significant others).
You cannot build a home for your self-worth inside of another person.
You cannot find a drink of water from the person who drained your well.
You cannot live a life marred by someone who is no longer present.
You cannot look to anyone else for validation or even distraction from your anxieties or fears.
The blessing is that you have all that you need inside yourself right now.
When you stop the seeking and return to your own self and remember your own worth and remember your own strength and reclaim your own rhythms, and ways, and your own happiness and write your new peace – your new destiny.
Your life does not get better by chance, it gets better by change.
Sharon Valentino, LMFT, Psychotherapist, Behavioral Health
Intensive Recovery 